Volume 1, Chapter 24: Being poisoned already
TL: flarewk
The news of Ji Lian Bing having a boyfriend merely took just two periods of lesson before it went widespread throughout the entire school. Actually, ever since the start of yesterday afternoon, these rumors were already being faintly spread around, especially since Ji Lian Bing's a bishoujo that almost everyone in the school would know about. The mountainous flower, who all along always rejected other people's confessions suddenly having a boyfriend, it definitely would have caused quite a huge ruckus.
This was even more exceptional in high school, where love topics like this would tend to spread out extremely wildly. Even the news of the neighboring class's who and whom dating together would be able to propagate out to the entire grading, needless to mention for love topics regarding Ji Lian Bing.
But this time, what followed with interest wasn't only just at Ji Lian Bing, but also at me, her 'boyfriend'.
Once the third period of class ended, our class was being blockaded to the point where water couldn't even drip outwards, as all of these people came to see what kind of a person exactly was Ji Lian Bing's boyfriend. But in contrast, our class of bizarre title-bearing people didn't express out anything, as I strongly suspected that it's because they felt this level of stuff was not even considered to be anything at all.
Within this group of normal people, each of them displayed looks of curious expressions as they surrounded me, they even discussed and pointed at me fervently.
"Who is it? That person sitting in front of Ji Lian Bing?" "Who exactly is that person?" "I feel that he's rather normal.........." "Damn it, so Ji Lian Bing actually liked that kind of loser, huh! Why must I be a gaofushuai!"
I'm really sorry that I'm such a loser! By the way, weren't you just here to show off only!
The feeling of suddenly being closely scrutinized wasn't really pleasant at all, it's just like being tied up by invisible ropes of visionary gazes, it being very discomforting. But this level of attention right now was the greatest 'weapon' that I currently possessed. That's right, as long as I had those gazes, Ji Lian Bing wouldn't be able to make a move on me directly.
Although it's being said as that............I had the distinct feeling that before Ji Lian Bing manages to kill me, this crowd of infuriated fans would be working together to rid me off already...........
A huge portion of people who came to surround us were males, and among these males, 80 percent of their statuses were already greyed, while 10 percent were blackened. Those were still alright; what made me worried was, I actually even spied a few red-colored ones............
There actually existed people who was so envious that they wanted to kill me already, huuh!
I'm sho shcared!
But the most scariest gaze came from the sides of the seat right behind me!
Lan Hua was using blood-shot eyes to glare at me, and I felt that her gaze alone could kill me, not to mention that her status had already become incomparably blackened already!
.............Did I made a mistake in my decision?
Speaking of which, Lan Hua's title was [Stalker (beginner)] right, it can't be that from now on she'll mark me as a target and start to stalk me already, hm?
Please don'tttt, I'll give Ji Lian Bing to you, so please spare me!!
"Oioi, Xiao' Hua, don't keep on glaring like that towards Jun Cheng-tongxue, don't you know that your gaze right now is really scary?"
"Uuu wehh?"
Luckily at this moment, Lan Hua's best friend Gao Ying Nai timely patted her shoulders, interrupting that chillingly frightening gaze.
"Ohh, so An Jun Cheng agreed to it as expected............Told you, I did say that Lan Hua definitely won't have any chance already."
"Oi oi, stop agitating her already!!"
Luo Ying Liang and Gao Ying Nai, these two people were Lan Hua-tongxue's good friends, and I often saw these three gathering together conversing. Sometimes, I'll even think whether these 3 had a triangle relationship with each other............but right now it doesn't seem to be that case.
"Eyy, it's really been hard on you on everything, Jun Cheng-tongxue..........."
Luo Ying Liang very sympathetically patted my shoulders.
"............"
Although I knew that he wasn't pointing towards the matter of being marked by Ji Lian Bing, but I still wanted to cry a little. Only you alone was being sympathetic with my situation, you're indeed such a nice person, Luo Ying Liang-tongxue............
"Really, Luo Ying Liang-tongxue, what are you saying? Cheng Jun dating with me is of course an extremely blissful thing~"
"Eh..........."
Blissful your head!!
"I see...........Mm, in any case, if you need any help, just let me know about it then, although I won't be able to guarantee that I'll be able to help you resolve it.........."
Luo Ying Liang pushed up his spectacles as he said.
This, this was! The legendary friend declaration?!
I probably didn't mistaken it, as Luo Ying Liang's status had turned to green color already!
Ohhhhhhh, Grandpa, your grandson had finally made a friend!
Sobsobsob, I'm too touched already, although you're a voyeur, I'll never ever despise you!
Ji Lian Bing meaningfully chuckled, not saying a single word...........her smile still looked to be so pretty, and so chilling...........
During lunch break, I carried my lunchbox and walked out of the classroom, with Ji Lian Bing following behind my back.
"You're not going to the canteen today? Cheng Jun?"
"............I made my own lunchbox."
"That's extremely great, let's go find a place where there's no one around, and enjoy a romantic lunch break period together then~"
What the hell kind of joke was this!
If I went to a place where there's no one, she'll definitely do something to me!
But, I indeed didn't really want to go to the canteen............
Normally speaking, being a couple, the best lunch spot would be the balcony already, but I didn't want to go there. Me and Ji Lian Bing were a pair of fakes, and there were filled with many real couples around; I wouldn't want to eat dog food at all.
Just at this moment, I saw through the windows that at the back of the school buildings, there's someone at the small forested pavilion.
Ohhh, it should be that kuudere girl, right. That's great, since she's there as an observer, Ji Lian Bing shouldn't be able to do anything to me already.
But...........
When I walked towards the area of where pavilion was, Jiang Xue Qing had actually disappeared!
"Ai ya, you've actually brought me to such a dilapidated place, are you planning to do something to me~?"
Oh shit, oh shitt!!
Right now can I run away already?
"Rest assured~, I won't do anything as of now. You could also see this location from the school buildings too, right?"
That's true, just now I was also able to see the pavilion having people from the school buildings, which was why I decided to come here in the first place. Then that means Ji Lian Bing wouldn't make active moves, huh..........
I silently walked towards the pavilion, and even purposefully sat at a seat facing outwards. As long as any sort of limbs conflicting develops, I was readied to shout out loudly anytime.
Ji Lian Bing well-behavedly sat by my side, and calmly opened her lunchbox, starting to consume her lunch...........she really didn't plan to do anything at all, huh.
But who knows, that there might be a dagger tucked in her sleeves or whatnot too............Mm, I'd better sit a little further then.
"You didn't even eat my lunch yesterday, aren't you going to try some today then?"
"I'll immediately go see the King of Hell after eating, right."
"You won'ttt~ such a good person like Cheng Jun, you'll definitely go see God instead~"
"I don't want to see either one of them!"
I frowned my eyebrows, strenuously poked an egg roll and sent it into my mouth.
"Having such a cute girlfriend, you should be more happier a little~, if not, who knows that there might be people who may suspect onto something, hmm?"
"Suspect onto something?"
"They'll think that you're just merely a shield that I've found, and afterwards, their attention on you will instantly dissipate, and when that moment comes..........."
When that moment comes, I'll turn back into that sort of being alone from the past already, right............to be frank, I was actually hoping to happily return to my original state, but right now it's unfeasible. At least not during these 3 days!
"Then what should I do exactly?"
"At least, you must be able to naturally do intimate stuff with me. Well then, right now let's just practice it over here, a couple's conversation and actions."
"Mm............"
Although she said it's conversation and actions between couples, but that means its a display of affection............what exactly should I do?
Being someone who from birth till today morning all the way not having any girlfriend at all, I don't even understand what it means by displaying affection.
If me and Ji Lian Bing were a pair of real couple, it's possible that we'll be able to naturally do these sort of actions............but the relationship between us were fake. If you really wanted to talk about it, its just like a worker who had signed a contract with his boss's sort of relationship.
"Just like earlier, that sort of mouth feeding behavior will be very affectionate~"
".........."
"Didn't I said it yesterday already? My lunchbox is being prepared by my maids, hence it's impossible that there would be any poison within it at all~."
As she said that, Ji Lian Bing hoisted a piece of fried chicken and placed it into her mouth, scrumptiously eating it.
"All right then..........."
Since she even ate it herself, it should be fine in that case then............
"Here~ Ahhh~"
I hesitated for a moment, but in the end I couldn't resist opening up my mouth, as the lunchbox that was prepared by maids still had a little bit of attraction towards me.
Smiling, Ji Lian Bing grasped the chopsticks hoisting the fried chicken piece as she sent it towards my mouth, and just when I was about to eat it............
Pa ta!
The chopsticks along with the food were being smacked away.
An expressionless Jiang Xue Qing had unknowingly appeared at my back.
"Eh?"
I confusedly moved my gaze towards Jiang Xue Qing.
And Jiang Xue Qing shook her head, saying: "It's poisoned."
"Eyy?"
Jiang Xue Qing still thought that I didn't understand it clearly, as she pointed at the chopsticks that had fallen onto the floor and repeated once more.
"It's poisoned."
The hairs on my arm immediately stood up!
She actually really poisoned it!
-ch 24 end-
(2514 words to tl)
Footnotes:
gaofushuai (高富帅)= a term used to describe a 'perfect man' that all girls dream about. It compasses of 3 terms, gao(高) + fu(富) + shuai(帅).
gao(高) = It's used to describe a trait of a man being "tall". I for one don't really believe how a tall person will be able to get the ladies, but feel free to enlighten me....
fu(富) = This one definitely I agree with. It means 'wealthy'. 80% of all girls out there goes for guys who are rich af. This means more gucci bags for them, more shopping opportunities, and an instant-marry to a life of wealth just by hooking up with that dude. Don't even try to argue against this logic, unless your a down-to-earth girl who's really sweet and nice. But they are extinct nowadays already.
shuai(帅) = It means 'handsome'. Now which girl doesn't like a handsome ass male, with ripped bodies, seductive looks, and cool korean-stylish hair? Judging by the amount of k-pop fan girls, I think this point is moot.
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dog food (狗粮) = It's a pun referring to the term '单身狗' (Single dog). It may not make sense in english, but that term actually means a person who's being single, thus like a dog who's usually lone by themselves too. And what does dogs eat? Dog food.....
P/N: Dog food, I hear, tastes bitter asf. That probably also contributed on the formation of this term, as when you see riajuu couples (despite you urself being lonely), there definitely may be a bitter feeling within you as well. (most people do)
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bishoujo = a term in jp used to describe a beautiful girl
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mountainous flower = a term to describe how hard it is to attain a girl who's way above your league, just like an unreachable mountain. (The flower here is being abbreviated to the girl, remember the phrase 'school flower' being explained before?)
Glossary:
Xiao' = a suffix placed forward of a name, this is to show affection and closeness towards someone.
-tongxue = a suffix for 'student'
Ahh... the start of the horror.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter
Please tell me she's a ninja.
ReplyDeleteshe's kinda the female lead in vol 2, so i'm expecting great things from her +_+
DeleteRIP MC you will be missed.. Unless you a zombie.. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
ReplyDeleteat least if he become zombie , he doesnt wear a freakin mahou shoujo costume while holding chainsawww
DeleteHe need to become a mahou shoujo like Aikawa from Korewa Zombie ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
DeleteWhat kinda fool would eat something given by a known enemy who has already said she is out to kill you
ReplyDeleteOne who didn't think about the fact that she might have poisoned the chopsticks instead of the food and needs to keep up an appearance so that people don't lose interest giving her the opportunity to make a more open attack on him.
DeleteEven if he hadn't thought of the chopsticks it's still stupid. Just because one part of her food is not poisoned doesn't mean the rest isn't. besides there's no benifit for her feeding you non poisoned food, none, shouldn't that idk be kinda suspicious. Why would you believe and accept the logic of the person who's trying to kill you. It's such an obvious trap. I get the protagonists logic of wanting everyones attention, it's just filled with holes.
DeleteThe MC had done a great job logically thinking stuff already imo, most of the times when faced with a situation you wouldn't go to think that far as well; that's why people have managers for events like F1 racing, football, and so on.
DeleteIn the heat of the moment, its extremely hard for you to response quickly and be able to give a good conclusive answer
I agree that so far the mc hasn't been too bad. But I must disagree, I don't think this kind of extremely obvious mistake can be written off as in the heat of the moment. Not unless you're very impulsive , which judging from the mc's character until now he isn't. It's really not "that far" to think she might be trying to poison you, when you've had plenty of time knowing she's a homocidal maniac, when I started reading the scenario The first and most prevalent thought in my head was "It's poisoned!" before the dialogue got anywhere near the point of actually revealing it. It's not rocket science or quantum mechanics, I would say anyone except maybe someone with a mental disability would of considered such a thing in such a situation. The fact that he allowed himself to get posioned by such an obvious play has decreased the realism to what has so far been an engaging story.
DeleteIf it was to be argued, it's "real" because he erred. It's not a novel where the MC is always perfectly making out conclusions all of the time; his inner dialogue usually reflected his cool, but in this case, like what Lian Bing had said, it's a ruse to deceive him that the food weren't poisonous,
DeleteOf course, the readers at a glance would be able to tell that "It's poisoned!" from the way Lian Bing "smiled" as she handed him the food, but think of it in his shoes. The "smile" wasn't really very devilish of some sort that you would immediately be aware that it's a ruse; plus it's mentioned several times already in the plot: The MC is more logical than an average person, but not prune to mistakes. Look how many times he was being mentioned as "not sharp, dense" by surrounding people.
The fact that he realized he's in "oh shit" when he reached the pavilion where there's no one, (or to even think to go there in the first place at all with just 1 onlooker) already hinted that he wasn't a very sharp person, with godlike intellect onto his every step. It was until Lian Bing pointed out that their position may be seen from others before he goes "ahh okay" stance.
TLDR: He's still human, he can logically conclude out steps on what will happen thereafter, he's resistant to lust even more than the average male thus helping him to logically think better, but to put him up so highly ranked with the topmost brilliant scholars who can plan their steps well, is frankly a horrible decision
Did you seriously expect this mc to be intelligent? He has shown over and over again since the start how dense and stupid he tends to be. He just about never shows any intelligence or spine.
DeleteAlready poisoned food...
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter
Not the food the Chopsticks. That's why she picked up the food to eat rather than use the chopsticks to "prove" that she wasn't trying to poison him. Luckily our idiot MC has Girls looking out for him.
DeleteThe MC still very naive I see. Already know she like your corpse, so shouldn't have trust anything she say.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter.
Why doesn't MC try to pair Corprse Lover with the zombie in class. Win win in my books.
ReplyDelete...genius.
Deleteah yeah.... the traditional quote.... RIAJUU GO EXPLODE !!
ReplyDeletedude, she only want the CORPSE, DEAD ONE, not the living one
ReplyDeleteUhh. What about the meimei's?
ReplyDeleteIt should have reached them right?
Are they sharping their knife?
Thanks for the chapter flarewk! Whoa she sure wastes no time at all eh. Already trying to kill him the next day.
ReplyDeleteI laughed so much !!!! XD XD XD Also, XD XD And.... I think the voyeur-boy might be gay.
ReplyDeleteThank you very very very much!!!
man you need to become a zombie to survive
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter : )
ReplyDeleteThanks!
ReplyDeleteWow, that popularity hex must be magnified by the Mirror.
ReplyDeleteHe just lent the silent girl a pillow & she not only saves his life, she explains what she's doing in clear easy-to-hear voice!
The old i didnt poisen the wine, i poisened your glass trick, substituting chop sticks for the glass.
She's an ingenious murder. MC isnt an idiot, but she's way smarter then him.
Good thing so many other girls around him are as well.
Lol
Thanks for the chapter
Oooooo.....
ReplyDeleteWhoa! Close one.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter!